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Archive for the ‘daily life’ Category

Traveling Two for One

No, this post is not about discount traveling, but in fact, dear readers, myself and the musician will be headed out of the country for one whole entire month starting tomorrow. I am anticipating a lot of busyness and do not anticipate being able to work on Doubled Up for quite a little while… Things to look forward to in September: Travel Posts! I love traveling and have a few little secrets to share with you. Chinese food! Who doesn’t love that? More musings about what it means to be an American. Feminism. In China. What does it look like?

STAY TUNED!!!! See you all in September!

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The Musician and I have just returned from a whirlwind trip to Colorado, which included among many things, hiking, eating, seeing family and…. celebrating our first year together. He and I chatted about the things that we loved most about marriage and I thought I’d share them with you.

1. We love waking up to somebody. (Mostly, sometimes I am in a bad mood!)

2. We love cooking dinner for each other. I especially love that I can try out new recipes or make up my own and always find a willing taster!!! Also, I especially love that HE DOES THE DISHES!!!!

3. We love that we have companionship and pray together regularly. Example, with our recent decision to go to China, we had to really think and pray through the cost benefits of going.

4. We love that we get to know each other more and more each day. I love finding those things that I say, “I didn’t know that about you!” To demonstrate, I didn’t know that the Musician hijacked the stage at a quartet camp when he was 17 to play Metalica on strings with his quartet! Right before the major guest artists!!! I bet he got into so much trouble!!!! I am still laughing at the image of my 17-year old husband (he had hair back then) stubbornly playing Metalica for a large audience of classical music snobs!!!!

5. Two for One. We really love to be there for each other. We have committed to one another through thick and thin, and praise God for companionship and shared vision, hope and life!

Of course, marriage is not always peaches and cream…. so I’d also like to share a few bits of advice we learned the hard way. Thankfully this year has gone really really well, minus some financial difficulties and setbacks that were temporary and stressful, we have really thrived with each other!

1. Don’t take it personally. So, I lived with roomates before marriage, I thought I was prepared to share space with someone I really really loved (even though I did love my rommies!). I was not prepared for the one fact that did not affect my shared roomie experience: taking it personally. If, for example, a toothpaste tube fell from a cabinet at 6:30 AM right on top of my head and I lived with roomates, I would be slightly annoyed, but I would put the tube back and laugh it off. However, when we had been married only 3 weeks, this exact situation played itself out, I began furiously accusing the Musician for booby trapping the cabinet and maliciously attempting to throw the toothpaste on me…. hmmmmm. That’s all I’ll say for now!!!!

2. Save it. When things are really stressful and you can tell that mentioning the topic will cause your partner to explode, I highly recommend saving it, storing it, and rephrasing it for another time. Amazingly, our brains have the capacity to figure out less painful ways of sharing that: the bank account is empty and you lost your job, you crashed the scooter, the refrigerator is not working and all of the food that you bought yesterday has been rotting in it for 12 hours… (these may or may not reflect actual and true events).

3. Take it for the team. The Musician and I have this annoying tendency to clean, but to leave each others laundry, toiletries, papers… dishes (!), side of the bed (!), uncleaned. We’re married, it’s OUR stuff. We should clean it together and if your hubby leaves his gross “lucky” boxers on the floor and you are cleaning up the room, don’t throw them as hard as you can at him, or nicely arrange them on his pillow, just put them where they belong… (and not in the trash can even if you think that’s where they should go!)

4. R-E-S-P-E-C-T!!! A little goes a long way. Assume that you are out for the others good. Honor the process of becoming who they want to be. This is really important in transition times (school, training, job search, etc!)

5. Assuming love. We noticed a profound difference when I began each day with the affirmation and assumption that the Musician actually loved me and was actually not attempting to sabotage my life. (It helps that he actually does love me! I don’t think you can take this advice if the guy is actually a creepo). I was more willing to let things go, not take it personally, and respond with love and affection.

Do you have marriage advice from your own experience (married or single!)? Would you like to share it! Write it in! I’d love to hear about it!

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The musician and I have been in a whirlwind of activities since January. Violin lessons, and violin training for him and school school school for me. This has left our little project so poorly neglected and in need of care. Well… as a kick off of the new spring season, we bring you… an update! The following are the things that we have been doing and that we recommend!

1. books worth reading: The Good Women of China by Xinran Xinran, Anxiety and Method by Deveraux, Liquidated by Karen Ho: an analysis of Wall Street Executives, highly informative and a must read in our current economic/political “situation”.

2. Movies worth seeing: actually, though we’ve seen a lot of movies recently, I can’t think of any to recommend.

3. Exercise worth doing: My April Showers run experiment was really great. Unfortunately, when May hit, I fell off the band wagon. However, we have been trying to get out more on our bikes. I now run 3x a week.

4. Food worth eating: Red Hot Kitchen: A mexican Asian Fusion to blow your mind. Seriously, come and eat.

5. People worth seeing: we’ve had a lot of visits with family recently. Thanks to the musician’s parents A and M for coming out for his last concert of the season and Uncle T with his friend L! It was a great time and inspired me to keep writing in our blog!

6. Music worth a listen: The musician has been playing with Santa Monica Symphony for an entire season. Their concerts are always free (frugal!!!) and well worth a trip. I have been dusting off my guitar skills, but so far, my only fans are the neighborhood dogs.

7. Other things worth doing: Making coconut yogurt: a sneak peak at what is next on our blog.

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Our first Thanksgiving was held in our trailer with our lovely family in addendance.  We missed the Musician’s side in Boulder and my bro in Bloomington, but my sis and parents were here.  We served a roast duck from Sam Woo Chinese deli along with traditional American sides (with a twist!)–gluten free cornbread stuffing, mashed potatoes, bacon fried sweet potatoes and a butternut spice tofu pie with almond crust!  Food was amazing and it turning into a lovely low key day.  We walked through the neighborhood and admired the lovely gardens, hiked up an abandonded hill to view the LA sky line and ate lovely cheeses.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

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It’s been a long time!!

School started and picked me up in a whirlwind!  It was hard enough to think about getting all my homework done, let alone how to be frugal!  Here’s a quick update:

1.  reading.  I’ve been reading a lot of books recently, both assigned and independent research.  Most interesting so far?  Marcel Mauss’ The Gift, and Marx.

2.  theory.  I’ve been plumping up my anthropological theory recently and learning about authors old and new.  Most unexpected and mind blowing theory?  Robert Miles’ notion of racialization.  Google Scholar him, you won’t be disappointed.

3.  health.  I think the parasites are finally gone!  The protocol for these things is to not actually retest unless symptoms persist, and no symptoms so far!  I just took another allergy test, hopefully to discover that the long list of “can’t have”s for me were just “transient” allergies caused by inflammatory reactions with the parasites.  I had my last visit to the naturopath for a good while, perhaps even 6-9 months.  I’m proud of the things I’ve accomplished by pursuing natural medicine, I think I’ve really made a difference in my life and the earth.

4.  transportation woes.  Bike broke, scooter speedometer malfunctioned, car battery died, the Musician got into a bike/car accident (he was on the bike), in short, I’ve been thinking about taking up walking.

5.  grant award.  My professor has been granted some money that will allow her to hire me to help her organize her things, edit papers and be mentored by her.  I think it will also help subsidize my work and research.  Hurray!

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I’ve been riding my buddy to and from school with a delightful joy bubbling deep within.  I laugh at the cars and feel slightly giddy at saving so much fossil fuel.  I have gotten the gumption to go around the long lines of cars stopped at South Pasadena High School and think, “I bet you soccer moms are jealous!”

Yesterday, I did not laugh however. Yesterday, I cried.   This was due to a small insect, namely a bee that flew directly into the crease between my helmet and face and began to sting me.  I don’t think I calculated the pain of a facial bee sting into my cost of riding the buddy.  OWWWWW!  I managed to safely pull into a parking lot before bursting into tears.  Currently, I now resemble someone infected by elephantitus, though the Musician claims I look as beautiful as ever, I know that the entire right temple is swollen to twice the size.

My courage has not waned however, and that very ride proved the utility of riding a 125cc since I was able to scoot out of the parking lot across 3 lanes of stopped traffic and into the left turn lane.  (Safely, of course, don’t worry Dad!)  I’m ready for the next adventure, which is perhaps coming sooner than I want it since it is raining today for the first time this season.  A week too soon for the shipping of my waterproof pants!  Ride on!

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Honeymoon: Pas de Deux

IMG_0175 One of the coolest things about Puerto Vallarta was the pelicans.  Each and every night we would see them soaring above the  the water, opening up their mouths and dive bombing head first into the waves.  Usually they came up with fish.  It was so fun to see.  Most evenings we would get dessert, lovely Mexican ice cream treats and walk in the sunset on the beach.  We’d usually return after dark and sometimes we’d get caught in a thunderstorm.  Those nights we’d get totally soaked, and end up slogging home, only to immediately jump into a warm jacuzzi to watch the lightning.

In addition to just resting and eating good food, we also had some great adventures.  One of my favorite activities was renting mountain bikes and riding up the mountain side.  Our guide was a really friendly guy who was very encouraging and said he “just really loved bikes”.  He was an environmentalist and complained on our ride about the gas powered atvs, “for fat people” he claimed.  We ended our ride at a mountain lake.

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and jumped right in!

After the long ride, we were ready for some relaxing, which we did by taking a bus to one of the less touristy beaches.

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That is the evening of the fateful lobster.  Uggh.  I swear I had giardia, or some animal that really wanted to get out of my intestines.  We got a taste of real married life… some major farts under the covers!!!  I guess that’s just life.  =)

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